The Cataractor
| The Cataractor | |
|---|---|
| Formal Name |
Unknown
|
| Species |
Human
|
| Gender |
Male
|
| Weapons |
A walking stick
|
| Factions | |
| Status |
Alive
|
| Home Reality | |
"The Cataractor" is a blind old man who was drafted into the Wang Gang from the Meme World crash survivors.
Description[edit | edit source]
The Cataractor was a rather stereotypical elderly human man: relatively short with a slight hunch, a furrowed face, and messy white hair. As his name suggested, he had cataracts present in both of his eyes and carried a walking stick for stability. He was quite curmudgeonly, having no patience for 'kids' 'bickering' without sufficient reason to or people asking him questions he considered obvious. He liked to nap and could become quite irate if he was woken by anyone or anything before he was ready to get back into action. However, he followed orders without question and was dedicated to getting the job done, regardless of how ridiculous or nonsensical his orders seemed at the time.
History[edit | edit source]
"The Cataractor", as he came to be known due to the cataracts present in his eyes, was one of the many characters who attended Kartouche's concert on Tybion. When a sect of Ta'har led by Wayfarer attacked the concert venue with the intention of slaughtering all the attendees, the Cataractor was hurried onto Hungry-man's flying log cabin, which then took off from the planet in order to escape. From there, the Cataractor was caught up in the Battle of the Log Cabin, but whatever fighting he did, if any, occurred offscreen. In his first recognized appearance, he surrounded the defeated Ta'har with the other surviving combatants and forced them to surrender.[1]
The Cataractor also survived when the log cabin crashed on Meme World. He evacuated the ship's wreckage with the others and suggested that their first course of action should be investigating another shipwreck over the horizon: The TSS Jet-Ball II. Patrick Bateman was dumbfounded that the Cataractor spotted it before anyone else, and asked him how he saw it. The Cataractor replied only with "Magic" before wandering away.[2]
When Ayy put word out that Lord Zrintch needed fighters for a new strike team, the Cataractor chose to sign up, and was drafted into the Wang Gang as a result.[3] The Cataractor went with the other Wang Gang recruits to meet the other strike team, the Dong Squad, aboard their ship. During the meeting, Merasmus appeared out of nowhere and threatened the group in his usual manner. This spooked the Cataractor, who swung his walking stick and cracked one of Merasmus's shins in response. Merasmus cried out in pain and left to hide and heal.[4]
The Cataractor accompanied the Wang Gang on their first mission: stealing the Keruvim from Vizima. On the journey there, he listened to Bill Wilson's story about his first encounter with Bane, and expressed his surprise upon hearing that he survived a plane crash. He also inadvertently broke up an argument between TTT and Hungry-man by showing his disdain at the kids' bickering and reminding them that they had a mineral to steal.[5]
When the Wang Gang's ship was disconnected from the main ship, and Pumkin slapped it towards Vizima's forest, the Cataractor was knocked unconscious by the g-force. He remained unconscious until they reached the drop zone and was ejected from the ship towards the Keruvim. The sudden drop woke him up in mid-air from his peaceful afternoon nap, which he was not at all happy about. Fortunately, Car Guard managed to get it through to him that he needed to open his chute before it was too late.[5]
Trivia[edit | edit source]
- The idea of the Cataractor came from a joking misreading of the Counter-Actor's name in the BZPB chat on Skype.
