Cory Baxter (DMU)

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Cory Baxter
Species
Human
Gender
Male
Allies
Enemies
Factions
Status
Deceased
 Home Reality 
"Yare yare daze..."
Cory Baxter[1]

In the Dark Mirror Universe, Cory Baxter was a member of the Pennis And Also Dicke And Balls Bureau.

Description[edit | edit source]

The Dark Mirror Universe's version of Cory Baxter was a black human man, described as a "shounen protagonist" who had a beard and a glowing left eye like that of a Witcher. He was incredibly confident in his own abilities and was somewhat sadistic, expressing no qualms about having to kill the Dong Squad mere hours after meeting them and delighting in taunting his opponents about their weaknesses.[1]

History[edit | edit source]

In 150,084 CMT (Day 69 of The Mazkertis Paradox arc), DM Cory and the Pennis And Also Dicke And Balls Bureau interrupted the battle between the Dong Squad and Kek that took place on the PAADABB's homeworld. Kek chose to flee the battlefield rather than face both teams at once, leaving the PAADABB and Dong Squad to their own devices. The PAADABB immediately introduced themselves to the Dong Squad and told them about how the lovable Kermit had become the evil Kek. When Punished Shrek revealed that the PAADABB were the first strike team that Lord Zrintch had formed, DM Cory supported this claim with an enthusiastic "Yeah!", but was otherwise silent.[1]

The PAADABB took the Dongers back to the Panus and Asenis base, where DM Cory helped Billy Mays work on a plan to sell Dong Squad and PAADABB merchandise in both their universes. DM Cory also eavesdropped on a conversation between Punished Shrek, Jesse Ventura, and BONES regarding Kek. DM Cory approached them with a theory that Kek would leave to unleash his wrath upon other worlds once he had finished ravaging whatever was left of the PAADABB's planet, which motivated the PAADABB and Dong Squad to join forces to kill Kek.[1]

DM Cory and his allies ventured out into the desolate city to find Kek, who soon materialized in front of them and announced that he had decided kill them all despite their increased numbers. In the battle that followed, DM Cory fired an explosive blast of energy at Kek but found that his attack barely scratched the hide of the demented former frog. Kek responded by reciting the alphabet and summoning magic blasts in the shape of each letter, one by one. DM Cory was overwhelmed by this attack once Kek reached the letter F, being blown into a pile of rubble. Neither the PAADABB nor Dong Squad met with much success until Punished Shrek pointed out that DM Soldier's long-ranged, combined attacks were doing more damage than the other's individual attacks. The PAADABBers and Dongers adjusted their attacks accordingly and overwhelmed Kek, who was finished off with a stab to the chest from DM D-Reezy. The allies returned to Panus and Asenis victorious, where the PAADABB (minus Hugh Neutron and Joey) entered a secret room and contacted Lord Zrintch to inform him of the death of Kek.[1]

Zrintch congratulated the PAADABB on their victory and revealed the reasons why he had turned Kermit to the Dark Side in the first place: to test the PAADABB and to "have some fun" with the Dark Mirror Universe in his absence. In addition, Zrintch said that he had hoped that Kek would have slain the Dong Squad, for they were an element of his plan that he no longer had use for, meaning that it was now up to the PAADABB to remove the Dong Squad instead. DM Cory grinned sadistically and accepted his new orders without question.[1]

The PAADABB then left the secret room and rejoined the Dong Squad in their celebrations while secretly waiting for a chance to stab their newfound compatriots in the back. However, DM Alex Jones was so disgusted by Zrintch's betrayal of the Dong Squad that he broke away from the PAADABB and warned Jesse Ventura of what his former teammates had planned for the Dong Squad. Ventura confronted Punished Shrek about DM Alex's claims and took a swing at Punished Shrek's face, but DM Cory blocked the punch with his index finger and taunted Ventura for being so oblivious to the truth. DM Cory then summoned a fraction of his power to unleash a whirlwind of punches upon Ventura, launching the former governor into a nearby wall. As the rest of the PAADABB and Dong Squad caught on to the situation and came to blows, DM Cory caught several frying pans thrown by the Dong Squad's Ayy-Lmaliums and teleported behind them, knocking the aliens and Ainsley Harriott to the ground by repeatedly hitting them in the backs with the palm of his hand.[1]

When DM Alex Jones unleashed his Super Saiyan form, DM Cory teleported in front of him and engaged him in hand-to-hand combat. The sheer force of the battle launched them out of Panus and Asenis and through the desolate city outside. DM Cory eventually gained the upper hand and teleported behind DM Alex to punch him multiple times, slamming him through several ruined buildings. Before DM Alex could recover, DM Cory pulled out drumsticks and began beating drums made of pure energy, each beat creating darts of energy that hung in the air. Once DM Cory had amassed a hundred darts, he launched them all at DM Alex like a volley of arrows, weakening the water filter salesman even further. Taunting DM Alex about his failure, DM Cory summoned enough energy to perform a killing blow and lunged at his opponent, but incredibly, he found that it was blocked by DM Alex, who had achieved a transformation into Super Saiyan II mode with moments to spare. DM Alex unleashed his fury by teleporting behind DM Cory and punching him through several ruined buildings before beating him into the ground at breakneck speeds. Realizing that the end had come for him, DM Cory was unable to hide the terrified look on his face as DM Alex released the most powerful Kamehameha that he had ever seen, the energy of which ploughed into DM Cory and utterly destroyed him.[1]

Abilities & Powers[edit | edit source]

  • Flight: DM Cory could fly independently without the need for apparatus or technology.[1]
  • Teleportation: DM Cory often tended to teleport behind opponents in battle to surprise them and gain an upper hand.[1]
  • Enhanced Strength: DM Cory had an aura of incredible strength that could be sensed by magic-attuned beings such as BONES and was strong enough to punch beings through walls and across cities.[1]
  • Energy Blasts: DM Cory could create blasts of an explosive energy and use them independently in battle or shape them into constructs. One battle technique practised by DM Cory involved creating an energy construct in the shape of a drum and drumming on it with energy-based drumsticks to rapidly generate energy darts that he could then launch at his opponents like volleys of arrows.[1]

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • Cory Baxter originates from the live-action teen sitcom Cory in the House. This version of Cory Baxter is based on the version seen in an internet meme where Cory in the House is incorrectly identified as an anime series.

References[edit | edit source]